Hi Haya,

I have a very strange question to ask. Sometimes, when I am sitting alone, I find myself overthinking as well as experiencing bizarre feelings.

I imagine myself in different scenarios where I either get kidnapped, die, feel like I'm losing someone close to me or as if someone is following me. This mostly happens at night. I also get weird dreams.

These thoughts can get really distressing. How can I overcome these feelings and understand why I am experiencing them altogether?

— An overthinker

Dear overthinker,

I understand how distressing and unsettling these intrusive thoughts and feelings can be. It's important to recognise that experiencing such thoughts does not mean that there is something inherently wrong with you. These thoughts can stem from various sources, including stress, anxiety and past trauma.

Here are some steps to help you overcome these feelings and gain a better understanding of why you are experiencing them.

Understand the cause

Often, overthinking and distressing thoughts can be a result of underlying stress or anxiety. It is important to identify any stressors in your life that might be contributing to these feelings.

Sometimes, past traumatic experiences and unresolved feelings and experiences can manifest as dark thoughts. Reflecting on any past experiences that might be influencing your current state of mind can be helpful.

Check on your mental health with a professional. Certain conditions such as generalised anxiety disorder, PTSD, or depression can also lead to intrusive thoughts and distressing dreams.

Develop coping strategies

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) techniques can help you identify and challenge irrational or distressing thoughts. Working with a therapist trained in CBT can provide you with tools to reframe negative thoughts and reduce their impact.

Practice mindfulness and meditation, as it can help ground you in the present moment and reduce overthinking. Techniques such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and guided imagery can be particularly effective.

Practice journaling. Writing down your thoughts and feelings can help you process them and gain insight into patterns or triggers. Journaling can also provide a sense of relief and clarity.

Create lifestyle changes

Establish a healthy routine that includes regular exercise, balanced nutrition, and adequate sleep. It can positively impact your mental health.

Actively reduce intake of stimulants like caffeine and sugar, especially before bedtime which can aid in reducing anxiety and improving sleep quality.

Engage in relaxing activities that you also find enjoyable, such as reading, listening to music, or spending time in nature.

Work with a professional

I would encourage you to work with a professional therapist and coach. Understanding what is making you feel this way is critical in getting better. A therapist will work with you in exploring and understanding past traumas in addition to working on your fears. Therapy can provide a safe space to discuss your experiences and develop effective coping strategies.

Once assessed they may also work with a psychiatrist where in some cases medication is helpful to manage symptoms.

By incorporating these strategies, you can begin to manage and reduce the impact of distressing thoughts and feelings. Remember, seeking support from a mental health professional can provide you with personalised guidance and tools to navigate this challenging experience.

Haya

Haya Malik is a psychotherapist, Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) practitioner, corporate well-being strategist and trainer with expertise in creating organisational cultures focused on well-being and raising awareness around mental health.

Send her your questions to [email protected]

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